Infidelity Advice

Infidelity advice can come from many places. Although many couples turn to a marriage counselor for advice about infidelity, there are other sources available.



If you're looking for a book, you might want to consider "Surviving Infidelity: Making Decisions, Recovering from the Pain." Here you will find infidelity advice about how to repair your relationship as well as information about different styles of infidelity. For example, some affairs are only sexual in nature while other affairs might lack the sex entirely. Just because an affair lacks sex doesn't make it any less an affair. Emotional affairs are real. The most dangerous and damaging affairs include both sexual chemistry and emotional bonding.



Another excellent book is titled "NOT Just Friends." Author Shirley Glass has written an excellent, easy to read guide describing the causes of affairs, how to work through the challenges that occur after an affair is discovered or disclosed, and how to work toward healing and forgiveness. One piece of infidelity advice that she offers is to dispel the myth that love and attachment will protect a marriage from infidelity. Author Glass writes that many husbands and wives cheat because they "unwittingly form deep, passionate connections before realizing that they've crossed the line from platonic friendship into romantic love." These are spouses are partners who had no intention of cheating and whose own value systems hold a view that cheating is unacceptable. These unfaithful spouses are betraying themselves and their marriages.



In addition to books, it can be helpful to reach out to friends who have worked through an affair. Just be certain the "friend" is a friend of the marriage. That is, that the friend will give you objective infidelity advice, won't take sides, and won't sit in judgment of the unfaithful spouse or partner. Also, probably best to choose a friend who knows how to keep a secret.



These days the internet is an excellent source of information related to affairs. As always, when using the internet, consider the source of advice. Many chat rooms and posting sites are nothing more than untrained and often inexperienced simply offering their uninformed opinion. It is probably best to look for a website that is written and maintained by a qualified marriage counselor. For example, check out the articles about infidelity at www.marriage-and-relationship-counseling.com/marriage-infidelity.html



One of the most important resources for infidelity advice is a Relationship Specialist. Many people will refer to this person as a marriage counselor or a couples counselor. Don't be misled by a therapist advertising that they do couples counseling. Keep in mind that not all therapists who are legally permitted to advertise this service have actually worked with couples inside of a clinic specializing in couples and/or family therapy. For more information about how to choose a Relationship Specialist, please consider this article: www.marriage-and-relationship-counseling.com/marriage-counselors.html



Be prepared for the fact that healing from infidelity is often a rather long and arduous path. All the more reason you need a knowledgeable guide who knows the territory. It is not unusual for the process to last between six months and two years.



Regardless of whether you end up staying together or going your separate ways, it can be healing to go through the process so that you end up making sense of the trauma of infidelity; and, so that you can work through any feelings of anger and betrayal.



Perhaps the best infidelity advice to consider is that working through an affair can be vital for your mental and physical health and well being. Do yourself a favor and don't try to short cut the process. Hang in there and be open to the healing and forgiveness process.